How to Prepare Neurodiverse Teens for College or Work: A Parent’s Practical Guide
Learn how to prepare neurodiverse teens for college or work with practical, supportive strategies that build independence, confidence, and real-world skills.
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Life After High School
Preparing for college or work is a big transition for all students and their families. For neurodiverse teens, it can include additional concerns and challenges. Many of the familiar daily supports that have been helpful will now change. Some of these include:
New routines:. When a student leaves high school, the routines will be completely different. This is true even if the student continues to live at home. Whether they start college, start a job, or take some time off, the daily routine will not be the same. For many neurodivergent students, this can be a challenge.
New expectations: Shifting out of high school and into work or college life, students can anticipate that there will be new daily expectations. For college students, they will have a class schedule to manage on their own, coursework to plan for the semester, and social opportunities to navigate. For students who go into the workforce, they will have responsibilities and will likely need to learn new skills.
More independence: Most students seek increasing independence once they are out of high school. For students with neurodiversity, some of this new independence may pose challenges. In addition, parents must consider reasonable plans to help teach independence without expecting more than their child is capable of at the time.
Less daily support: Students in the school system who have received special education services have a wide array of supports available to them through the school district. Once high school ends, these comprehensive support systems also end. The resources for adults with unique needs are not as thorough, nor are they as easy to access.
This transition is not just about academics or about jobs. It is about life skills, confidence, self-advocacy and self-understanding.
Why This Matters
Even when neurodivergent teens do well in school, they may need extra support in certain areas to increase independence and enhance their chances for success in the community. Some areas that may benefit from extra support include executive functioning skills, social communication and problem-solving, self advocacy, and daily living skills. Working with students to prepare ahead of time for life after high school can help reduce stress, build confidence, and prevent them from feeling overwhelmed.
Start with Strengths
Before focusing on challenges, identify your teen’s strengths. Ask yourself:
- What are they good at?
- What do they enjoy?
- When do they feel most confident?
- What have they gotten positive feedback about from others?
Strength-based planning can help increase motivation . It is also good for starting from a place of confidence to guide career and college decisions.
Build Real-Life Skills (Not Just Academic Skills)
Success in college or work depends in part on daily life skills. For example, personal care skills are important for community involvement and socialization. While it is fine to choose clothes and hairstyles that are unique, it is important to look and smell clean. This involves regular habits for good personal hygiene and laundry care.
It will also be important for teens who are getting ready to increase their independence to learn and use good time management and organizational skills. Granted, this can be a challenge for many teenagers, it presents difficulties for neurodivergent teens very often. Helping your teen learn to use a planner, keep track of materials for classes, for work, and for home, and establishing routines will be beneficial, and just as important for success as good grades or positive evaluations at work.
Teach Self-Advocacy
Self-advocacy involves learning skills to stand up for oneself in the world. For teens getting ready to transition out of high school, this may include asking for help. Or explaining their needs to employers, coworkers, and professors. It may also include focusing on helping teens understand their own strengths and challenges. You can work with your child by helping them practice how to ask for help, how to email a professor, or how to ask for accommodations.
Practice Real-World Experiences
One of the best places to teach skills is in a natural setting. Consider encouraging your teen to try a part time job, or do some volunteer work. Teens can also practice real world social skills by getting involved with groups at school or community-based activities. These kinds of experiences can help build confidence while helping teens learn about expectations for community involvement.
Prepare for Social and Emotional Changes
College and work environments will be an adjustment, regardless of how well you prepare your teen for the next steps. Your teen may need support with things like handling feedback and managing stress. Keep the communication lines open, using every opportunity to talk openly with your teen about what might feel challenging, what strategies can help, and letting them know that you are there to support them.
Create Support Systems
Becoming independent from one’s parents does not mean “no support”. Parents should continue to provide support, but should also help their teen identify natural supports on campus or at work. Consider helping your teen identify trusted adults in their lives and campus or workplace resources. It may also be good to help your teen become familiar with disability services and mental health supports at school or in the community.
For Parents: Adjusting Your Role
It may be difficult to think about, but this transition also changes your role as parents. You may shift from managing everything to a coaching and supporting role. This may include letting your teen try to do things, even if it is challenging. Try shifting from offering solutions to offering guidance. Encourage your teen to work on problem solving skills with your support, but without giving the answers. Learning how to do these things on their own will be a big step towards finding success after high school.
Thank you for reading, and stay tuned for upcoming “Tip of the Week” posts to help prepare your teen for life after high school!
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